Such is Navy life

It's been awhile since I've posted anything, and I hate that.

We are gearing up for another Navy move, and all the emotions I had before and after I left California are rearing their ugly heads again. Moving so much is really starting to take its toll on me. Just about the time I get comfortable and make lasting friendships, it's time to move again. On the flip side, if it weren't for the Navy, I wouldn't have half the friends I do. And thanks to facebook and the telephone I'm able to keep in touch with those wonderful friends that I have all over the US.

I've been having a hard time keeping it all together lately. Trying to be a good mom, a good teacher (both to my kids and the preschoolers at church), and a good friend while trying to keep the house clean, the bills paid, and food on the table all with a smile on my face is becoming harder and harder. I'm much better at all those things when I have my helpmate here with me. Especially being a firstborn, I feel like I need to keep it together and organized and running smoothly ALL THE TIME. I criticize myself and get down on myself when I can't. Like, if I can't hold it together there's OBVIOUSLY something wrong with my schedule or lack thereof. I don't feel like I'm as strong as everyone thinks I am, and most of the time I'm stronger than I ever wanted to be.

Being a perfectionist-planner, living in limbo makes me crazy. I have no idea where we're moving in just a few months and it is definitely a source of frustration for me. Communication has not been going too well with J right now, which is another source of frustration. This part of our lives will be over soon, and I'm looking forward to being able to talk to him every day for 3 years. It sounds like bliss right now to be honest. I haven't talked to him everyday of the year since 2004. I do have wonderful friends that are helping me through this. I just need to teach myself to know my limits and ask for help when I need it. I refer you to the previous paragraph, however. :-)

Switching gears a bit, I want to talk about my recent weight loss. I started taking Zumba classes in mid-July. I love Zumba and it's exactly what I needed to keep me motivated about exercise. I've been a slacker the last week, but I plan to get back into the swing of things today. I've lost 10.5 lbs and at least 9 inches total. From doing a bit of low carbing since J has been gone, I'm starting to realize just exactly what carbs do to my body. I've decided that I'm going to give Atkins a try. I don't know that I will follow it strictly, though; I will do a modified version of it. For example, I'm not going to avoid eating fruit when I'm choosing to eat fruit instead of a bag of chips, kwim? We'll see. I might decide differently.

I must end this for now. I must take hold of the joy and peace that only God can provide me. I hope to update my blog more often.